have you ever been surrounded by people but still feel so alone and so small?
i cant make friends with people easily. it is a known fact, maybe even a problem,
for me. okay maybe i can make friends but being friends, thats when the real challenge
kicks in, i am an anti-social, i know, and i need no reminder for that. sometimes, i try
not to be one but the harder that i try, the more it backfires on me and then i feel even
worst inside. inside. yes inside. its a feeling deep down my heart. a place where noone,
sometimes even myself can reach and truly understand. i really want to open up more,
meet new people and not have this invisible barrier in between us. a barrier that makes me
feel afraid to even look at the person in the eye, let alone speak. it is really an irony why i am
in a media course. it is ironic that this anti-social-shy-low-self-esteem-no-confident girl could
be interested in a field that requires her to meet, talk and shake alot of strangers hands when
she cant even give a proper hi when she meets imans friend.
life oh life. or should it be yanti yanti yanti tsk tsk tsk.
sigh, anyway, my name is nur haryanti and welcome to my life. as a total retard.